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When it comes to sex, we tend to have strong feelings about our favorite positions or erogenous zones. But for many, pleasure — especially reaching climax — is all about engaging the mind. Whatever it is that whets your curiosity, remember that having sexual fantasies is common, normal, and no reason to feel ashamed.

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And role-playing can be a fun and safe way to put your fantasies into action and connect with your partner s on a deeper, more intimate level. This category of fantasy amplifies and explores power exchanges that are sometimes diametrically opposed to our power dynamics in real life. For example, a CEO who likes to take charge in the boardroom but likes being spanked like a baby in the bedroom.

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Maybe you lust after an ex as soon as they become unavailable, or maybe you love it when your partner calls you names in bed that they could never safely say in public. According to Engle, every relationship possesses three sexualities: the sexual person you are, the sexual person your partner is, and the sexuality you create together. Role-playing is a way to explore that third one. Are you down for something like that? Acknowledging and acting on our deepest sexual desires is a wildly empowering and satisfying experience. Whichever way you choose to explore, be safe, and — most important of all — have fun.

Bobby Box is a journalist whose work on sex and culture has been published just about everywhere. Coming out as queer halfway through his career, Seeking nasty fun has amassed a considerable and respected audience and has become recognized as a studied and shameless voice in the community. Follow him on Twitter at bybobbybox.

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There is no set script for a standard sexual encounter. One writer shares how queer sex has…. These foods are noted to help arousal but we think the real magic is the effort you're putting in to make tonight work. Get it! Some of the reasons behind the trepidation are not, however. We debunk some of…. Are you a newbie to the world of sex toys? Check out our guide and quiz to help you find the perfect vibrator for you.

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Looking for the best porn sites to help you reach the finish line? Check out our picks for the best ethical porn sites to try solo or with a partner. Remote-controlled sex toys have risen in popularity. We take a look at what they provide for solo and partnered play and break down 10 of our faves. Three-or-more-somes Power dynamics The new or novel Non-monogamy The taboo Meaningful romance Gender-bending and sexual fluidity Broach the subject Start solo We include products we think are useful for our readers.

Share on Pinterest Illustration by Brittany England. The more the merrier: Sex with multiple partners. Keeping things fresh: Novelty and adventure. Reimagining partnership: Non-monogamy. More than skin-deep: Romance and meaning. Sex from a new perspective: Gender-bending and sexual fluidity. How to bring up fantasies and role-playing with your partner.

Explore fantasy in other ways. Read this next. Dirty Talk: 15 Tips for Getting Your Mind in the Gutter, According to a Dom Dirty talk can be a powerful tool for building desire and enhancing connection with a partner but it doesn't come easy to all of us. A Whole Day of Eating for Pleasure? Cum One, Cum All!

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These are the 7 Most Common Sexual Fantasies — Did Yours Make the Cut?